it takes place on a cheesy world called PHONDOO...
world of Phondoo is a place full of unique and bewildering creatures, deep
within the cheese of things. The seas and
skies are swarming with the likes of which legends are made and contribute tales
to the Fisherman Chronicles - great books which hold the prophecies of Phondoo.
But the books are in grave danger, for one day strange space beings
arrived, great Leviathan Worm
beasts from another dimension began to devour the Fisherman
Chronicles. So, Captain John and
crew of tweekers make haste to save the Chronicles from being eaten - before
they are lost, forever.
the way they meet many different characters which sometimes aid in Captain
John's quest , such as Professor
Nutbutter, Tommy the Cat
and The 'Ol Diamondback Sturgeon. There are others
that oppose Captain John and want to rid him of
the seas, such as Sergeant Baker and
his Puppy Army, the Island of Pig-heads,
Frizzle Fry and Mr. Knowitall.
mishap adventures bring Captain John and crew to the edge of a cheese-rift in
time, a final voyage where they must travel through dimensions to battle the
Leviathan’s and stop them from eating all of Phondoo’s Fisherman Chronicles.
( based on John the Fisherman ) is the
main character and master of the vessel Stonehard. He has an able body crew and sails the seas of cheese on the
world known as Phondoo. He may be ornery and weird but he is just and true.
He has sailed many seas and has faced many obstacles along the way.
Captain John protects the most ancient creatures of the deep and preaches
the prophecies of the Fisherman Chronicles.
An ancient set of books left from the even more ancient fishermen who
wrote them. They are the most
precious of things to men of cheese and are dug up as true treasures.
Captain John is the first of many fishermen to encounter the strange
Leviathan creatures which are slowly eating up the books all across the world.
He sets out with his crew of tweekers, and other unique friends he meets
along the way, to stop the strange beasts from devouring the Fisherman
Blue Collar Tweekers (
based on the song ) are Captain John’s crew. A
group of working class blue men who may be a little tweeky but they keep up the
ship and act as back bone to the
captain. They are constantly
repairing and painting the ship and have a bad habit of using cheese; on this
world, cheese has many uses, some of which are mind altering...
- Les, Ler and Brain are
stowaways on the ship. At first
they seem to enjoy messing around with the crew and such, but eventually they
must earn their keep. So they become
the ship’s band.
Ol’ Diamondback Sturgeon
( based on the song ) is a wise and ancient fish which has never been captured
by any man. Some have come close
but have never been able to out smart it. Ol’
Diamondback has swam the far reaches of Phondoo’s seas and knows of many
things. It has even been near the
Great Cheese-rift which has recently embellished itself to the southern pole.
The fish kept clear of this pulling cheese-rift but got close enough to
see the horrors that came out of it. He
joins Captain John and acts as a guide through fogs and other such perils.
the Parrot (
based loosely on The year of the Parrot ) resides on the shoulders of Captain John.
Floyd can never give a straight answer to anyone and only sings out in
metaphors and quotes from others.
and her Big Brown Beaver (
based on the song ) see the captain and crew while the ship is in a port.
Wynona is one of many women that has been in Captain John’s past and
has waited for John’s return. Her Beaver friend is now her companion
and goes with her everywhere. The
captain agrees to allow them to join the ship’s compliment but only if she
works as cook and her beaver makes itself useful... somehow.
based on the song ) is
a renown chemist, entomologist and creator of Old
Nutbutter’s House of treats; a candy/magic shop
which deals in jams, sweets and mystical concoctions.
The Stonehard and crew pay him
a visit on his island and ask him for scientific assistance with the bewildering
stories of these Leviathans that have been eating the chronicles.
He joins the crew and acts as the ship’s scientist and sweets guy.
He eventually redesigns the ship and alters it to be space-worthy.
Tommy the Cat ( based on the song ) having been lost at sea and now washing through a cheesy bay on a raft ends up smashing into the bulkhead of the Stonehard. The crew rescue him and bring him back to health. Tommy is a cool cat and takes no jive from John. But Tommy is unable to convince the captain to bring him to shore so he starts a gambling ring in the barracks. Of course he has the hots for Wynona and tries to win her heart, but the Beaver is a pesky bastard and doesn’t let anyone get too close.
THE BAD GUYS
based on the song ) is a creature who lurks in the deepest seas of cheese.
A slimy bulbous head-thing who rises from the cheese and feeds on the
charisma of fisherman. It has no
values and believes in nothing that it can’t eat.
It begins to eat at the ship, looking to stop the men and drain them of
their charisma, but Captain John tricks the beast into letting them go by
putting on a silly uniform that Frizzle Fry recognizes as an old friend...
another captain entirely...
island of Pigheads (
based on Pork Soda ) is a place where Captain John stops for provisions and
discovers these pig-headed people who just won’t help him.
The Pigheads sit around in rooms littered with sausages, beer cans and
mud. They are too lazy to give
their time to John and will not stop eating to give him their food.
The Blue collar tweekers trick the Pigheads by offering them a plate of special cheese brownies. These
in fact act as a depressant and leave the Pigheads asleep and unable to protect
their food. The Stonehard
and crew set sail, galleys full.
Baker and his Puppy Army (
based on Sgt. Baker and Too Many
Puppies ) want to stop Captain John from saving the books, because their
militaristic minds have no room for the moralistic knowledge that the Chronicles
hold. The books only speak of war
in trying to prevent it. To work
together in harmony. And Baker is
trying to take over the world. He
will stop at nothing to keep John from savings the books. Baker decides to make an alliance with Mr. Knowitall.
based on the song ) is a rich power-hungry twerp who wants to control the entire
world of it’s cheese, basically Phondoo’s worst bastard.
He thinks he knows everything and is the snobbiest person around.
Mr. Knowitall teams up with the Leviathans and helps direct them to
Phondoo’s Hidden Chronicle Vaults, where the creatures begin to terrorize
large cities ( a good place for Southbound
Pachyderms to make an appearance ). Mr.
Knowitall gets flattened by debris of a tumbling building and Professor
Nutbutter scoops him up and places him in a sealed tube.
Later, on the ship, Nutbutter tinkers with Knowitall’s body and mind
and turns him back into the child that he is.
based on Here come the Bastards ) are harpy type creatures which dive down on ships at sea and relieve their
flatulent gases over the heads of
crewmen. They make an appearance
just one time as a quick diversion and never return... or do they?
based on My name is Mud ) is a
towering muddy giant who finds the Stonehard and thinks that he can put the ship in a bottle.
But before he can do it he gets into a fight with another giant and
places the ship back into the sea.
based on this story ) are horrible giant vicious worm like creatures searching
the universe with the need of feeding on the knowledge of men; in this case, The
Fisherman Chronicles of Phondoo. They
are creatures yes, but they are also high sentient creatures as well.
That’s why they feed on the books, to satisfy their hunger for
knowledge. They pose a major threat
to the intellect of Phondoo and what the chronicles represent.
Phondoo will ultimately fall under the dictatorship of Sergeant Baker and
his Puppies if the Leviathans are not stopped in time;
stopped from removing the very intelligence of Phondoo.
John, a stern fisherman, and his able bodied crew of Blue Collar Tweekers,
a group of working class blue men who keep up the ship and act as back-bone
to the Captain, ready the Stonehard to set sail for another day of fishing
the seas of cheese.
the Stonehard is in port, Wynona, a past lover of John, approaches the ship
with her big brown Beaver. She
pleads for John to take her back and offers her services as cook.
John cannot refuse, so Wynona and Beaver join the crew. John gives the order to leave port and the Stonehard sets sail
for the open sea.
Blue Collar Tweekers work readying fishing nets and such.
Wynona, enjoying the heat of the sun, removes her hat to let her hair
blow in the wind and 3 mosquito stowaways fly out from under it.
The mosquitoes fly around the crew taunting and teasing while stinging
them for a meal. They make quite a
commotion on board and are brought to the attention of Captain John.
John hates the idea of stowaways getting on his ship and has many ways of
dealing with them, and in this case, he threatens to feed them to the Beaver if
they don’t work for their keep. Besides
messing around with people, the mosquito’s only profession is playing music.
So John orders them to work off their stay as the ship’s band.
the Stonehard far out at sea, the crew lays anchor and begins throwing out the
fishing nets. After a short time, the nets are full of fish and are pulled
in by the Tweekers, but one net is snagged on something which pulls back.
The Tweekers all join in on an exhausting tug of war with the mysterious
catch in the net. When suddenly, in a blasting belch, Frizzle Fry, a bulbous
head-thing who feeds on the charisma of men at sea, arises from inside the net
and chews it apart. The men fly
onto their backs and Frizzle Fry attempts to break through the ship’s hull by
ramming into it. The Captain, with
knowledge of how to defeat Frizzle Fry, leaves the main deck and enters his
cabin. The Tweekers try to fight
off the creature with oars and even
throw in some fish to stop it, but they are over-powered by Frizzle Fry.
Some of the Tweekers fall victim to it and are stripped of their
charisma. Captain John returns to
the deck and greets Frizzle Fry wearing a silly uniform resembling another
captain entirely... crunch that is. Frizzle
Fry recognizes John as an old acquaintance and apologizes for feeding on some of
the crew’s charisma. It belches
and gurgles as it leaves the ship for the lurking deep. John removes the hat from the costume and comments on how
Frizzle Fry always seems to easily fall for that trick. John’s parrot Floyd, who only speaks in metaphorical
quotes, says, “ I do believe in Captain Crunch... brock...” and the crew gets back to work throwing out the fishing nets.
that night, a gigantic wall of lightning blasts and surges in the darkness.
The sea of cheese pulls into the wall of energy and a portal forms.
This portal of energy opens and emits a bright light.
Suddenly, giant vicious worm-like creatures plunge from out of the portal
and into the sea of cheese. The
worms swim through the sea and approach a ship.
The first mate of this ship spots the worms and sounds the alarm, but he
is too late. The worms attack the
ship, rip it apart, search through the rubble and find many books.
They devour the books and plunge back into the sea.
crew of the Stonehard are awakened by blasting bolts of lightning on the
horizon. They observe that the sea
of cheese begins to swell and seems to pull in on itself from the direction of
the lightning. The Stonehard is
pulled into this force and Captain John cautiously decides to order a course
correction, turning the ship away from this strange occurrence.
The Captain orders “Bed down!”, and returns to his quarters to write
down in his logs the strange tale of the pulling cheese and the blasting night
the morning, the screeching cry of a cat awakens part of the crew including
Wynona, who springs out of bed in concern.
She runs to the deck and looks down toward the sea to find Tommy the Cat,
a real cool cat, sprawled across a raft, dehydrated and ill.
The Tweekers lower grappling hooks onto the raft and pull him up to the
deck. Wynona gives Tommy some water
and a blanket and carries him to a room where she nurses his wounds, with the
approval of the Captain of course. Tommy
wishes to thank Wynona for her help and tries to get close for a kiss.
But the Beaver, who is a pesky bastard, bites back and slows Tommy’s
plans of winning Wynona’s heart.
serves breakfast in the galley. The
Tweekers eat and talk shop while
Tommy the Cat joins the Captain’s table, as a guest.
Tommy tells a tale of being lost at sea and of the strange lightning
storm of last night. He heard many
strange noises out there all alone and is convinced that something is happening
out in the sea. He witnessed the
sea of cheese pulling in on itself and also saw a ship that fell victim to giant
worm-beasts. He pleads for the
Captain to take him to shore, but John, who has now grown more curious, orders
the crew to return to the coordinates of last nights lightning storm. There, he will investigate the wreckage of the attacked ship
and the sighting of the worm-beasts.
breakfast, Wynona brings it to John’s attention that the ship’s food supply
is not adequate enough for her talented cooking and that they need to stop for
provisions. The Stonehard reaches an island where Captain John
reluctantly agrees to stop for provisions and such.
The Captain and crew soon discover this island to be the home of
pig-headed people who just won’t help anyone.
The Pigheads sit around in rooms littered with sausages, beer cans and
mud. They are too lazy to give
their time to John and will not stop eating to give him their food.
The Blue collar tweekers, who have a talent for cooking up cheese recipes
which are mind altering, trick the Pigheads by offering them a plate of special
cheese brownies. These in fact act
as a suppressant and leave the Pigheads asleep and unable to protect their food.
The crew fill the galley and the Stonehard sets sail.
Stonehard is attacked by the Bastards, harpy women who dive down on ships at sea
and relieve their flatulent gases over
the heads of crewmen. The harpies
fly over the tweekers and irritate them with farts.
The Tweekers throw the Bastards some fish and they fly off.
reaching the coordinates of the storm, the Stonehard soon approaches the
ship’s wreckage that Tommy the Cat had spoke of.
Here, a great fish swims around the planks of wood that float to and fro.
It is the Ol’ Diamondback Sturgeon.
An ancient fish which swims the seas and has never been captured by any
man. Captain John greets this old
respected adversary, and asks it for information about what might have occurred
here last night. Ol’ Diamondback
tells of the blasting storm and how the sea of cheese seemed to be pulling into
a great opening in the storm. The
Sturgeon kept clear of this pulling cheese-rift but got close enough to see the
horrors that came out of it. It saw
giant worm-like beasts attack the ship, search through the rubble and feed on
the ship’s Fisherman Chronicles. Captain
John, fearing the loss of any Fisherman Chronicles, asks Ol’ Diamondback for
help in searching the seas for these worm creatures and the Sturgeon agrees.
seagull wearing a flying ace’s cap circles overhead.
It watches and listens in on John’s conversation with Ol’
in a secret stronghold, Mr. Knowitall, a rich power-hungry twerp who wants to
control the entire world of it’s cheese, watches in on Captain John by means
of hidden devices on his spying sea-gull. Intrigued
by these worm creatures, Mr. Knowitall contacts his assistant, Sergeant Baker,
and orders him to assemble his Puppy Army in preparation for confronting the
Baker wants to help Mr. Knowitall take over the world almost as much as his need
to eliminate the Fisherman Chronicles. Sergeant
Baker opposes the Fisherman Chronicles because his militaristic mind has no room
for the moralistic knowledge that the Chronicles hold.
The books only speak of war in trying to prevent it and to work together
in harmony. If these worms aim to rid Phondoo of the Chronicles, Sergeant Baker
will stop at nothing to keep Captain John from saving the books.
Sergeant Baker assembles his expendable Puppy Army and sets out in search
for the worms.
on the Stonehard, the crew washes the deck while John searches through his
treasure of Chronicles for a prophecy on the worm-beasts.
He comes across a volume foretelling of a great dimensional rift in space
that brings giant hungry Leviathan beasts to Phondoo.
It goes on to mention grave danger in store for Phondoo and the Fisherman
John’s only knowledge of the lifestyle of a worm, is that they are bait to
fish. He realizes that he needs the
scientific help of his friend Professor Nutbutter, a renowned chemist,
entomologist and the creator of Old Nutbutter’s House of treats; a candy/magic
shop which deals in jams, sweets and mystical concoctions.
Captain John knows of Professor Nutbutter’s intellect and of his
interest with worms and other crawling creatures.
Surely the Professor can think of some way of dealing with the
Leviathans. So Captain John changes
course and heads for Nutbutter Island.
the way, the Stonehard is suddenly pulled out of the sea by Mud, a towering
giant who searches the sea for things that he can collect.
He finds great excitement in scaring the crew and proposes to put the
ship in a bottle. Another giant
surfaces from the cheese and also wants the ship.
He pushes Mud and demands he hand it over.
Mud puts the ship down into the sea and begins to fight this other giant.
While the two giants fight and argue endlessly, the Stonehard makes an
escape and continues on course for Nutbutter Island.
at Nutbutter Island, the crew anchors the Stonehard and the Captain rows to
shore with some Tweekers. They
are met by a monkey, Albert, who greets the Captain in English and begins to
guide them to Professor Nutbutter’s laboratory.
The monkey is an experiment in which the Professor was attempting to
raise the creature’s sentient level and was successful.
But the monkey shows a bit of an attitude when it comes to respecting men
and gives Captain John a hard time. Wynona
smiles and offers the monkey a banana. The
monkey looks at her with a droll smile and replies, “No thanks, I don’t care
are lead to the laboratory and are greeted by Professor Nutbutter,
a truly nutty professor, who runs around in a dizzying furry, dropping
blueprints and scratching his head. Captain
John gives his Chronicles to the Professor and explains what has been happening.
Nutbutter looks through the books, mentions hearing of other ships that
have been falling victim to the same creatures and reads through the correct
volume in an instant. The Professor comes to a conclusion that the Leviathans feed
on knowledge and are here to eat the Fisherman Chronicles, the most treasured
knowledge of Phondoo. The Professor has the Tweekers pack his laboratory into
the Stonehard and happily joins Captain John in the quest to stop these
Leviathans crush through a dense forest and break through to a small
town. People scream and
scatter the streets as the great worm-beasts storm through home after home,
looking for books. The Leviathans
break into a library and feast themselves full.
Baker leads a group of tanks through the town and arrives at the Library.
Sergeant Baker orders his Puppy Army to drive a compartment of books over
to the Leviathans. The Puppies
reluctantly salute and whimper a sigh as they get in the compartment’s jeep.
They drive over to the Leviathans and dump the books on the ground.
One of the beasts slithers it’s head down to the pile of books and eats
a few. The worm reaches out over
Sergeant Baker’s head, lowers it’s head down and breathes on him. Sergeant Baker considers an alliance made and pulls the tanks
on the Stonehard, Professor Nutbutter starts designs for re-fitting the ship to
be space-worthy. He believes that once the Leviathans have eaten all of the
books, stripping Phondoo of it’s knowledge, the worms will probably return to
the temporal cheese-rift from once they came. Captain John would need to take
the Stonehard through the temporal cheese-rift to deal with the Leviathans on
their own turf.
Ol’ Diamondback Sturgeon returns from scanning information from the seas of
cheese and warns Captain John that Mr. Knowitall has lead the Leviathans just
off the coast of Punchbowl City, the location of the Great Chronicle Vaults.
Captain John frantically changes course for the city and the Tweekers set
the Stonehard at full sail.
Knowitall and Sergeant Baker help direct the Leviathans through Punchbowl City
toward the Vaults. The creatures begin to terrorize the city looking for books
when a few Southbound Pachyderms fly down from out of the sky and wage a fight
on the Leviathans. Several
buildings crumble to the ground and Mr.
Knowitall and Sergeant Baker get flattened by debris of a tumbling building.
The Pachyderms are easily eliminated and the Leviathans arrive at the
Vaults and begin eating.
John and crew arrive at the Vaults to find them empty and the Leviathans gone.
Professor Nutbutter finds Mr. Knowitall and Sergeant Baker as flat as
pancakes. He scoops them up, places
them in sealed test-tubes and plans of experimenting on them later in his lab.
at the Stonehard, Captain John has the Tweekers start re-fitting the ship as per
Professor Nutbutter’s specifications. The
Tweekers work in a frenzy welding and fitting the ship with rocket-blasters and
an atmospheric bubble shield. While
the Tweekers work on re-fitting the Stonehard, Professor Nutbutter tinkers with
the bodies of Mr. Knowitall and Sergeant Baker and turns them back into the
children that they once were.
the re-fit complete, the Stonehard rockets out of port and heads for the sea.
Leviathans swim through the sea of cheese, making their way back to the portal
John and full compliment of crew, enjoy a last meal/party in the galley before
they go to battle with the Leviathans. All
of the tweeky additions to the crew are present and the band plays on.
ship arrives at the portal and hovers high above it.
The crew leave the galley and head for their positions.
The Tweekers load the cannons and man them for battle.
Captain John orders that the Stonehard enter the portal at his command
and they wait for the Leviathans.
Leviathans swim closer to the portal in the horizon.
The portal is activated and the bursting storm pulls at the seas of
cheese once again.
look-out on the Stonehard sounds the alarm that the Leviathans are near.
The Leviathans swim through the sea and into the portal.
The Captain gives the command and the Stonehard follows the Leviathans
into the portal. The Stonehard
flies through a bright-colored fast-moving worm-hole and ends up in space and in
orbit around the Leviathan’s home world.
Leviathans see the Stonehard and begin to approach it.
The Captain gives the order to fire and the cannons blast out at the
Leviathans. The battle begins, and
a mighty battle at that. The
Stonehard’s cannons pound at the worms and come close to defeating them, until
the worms can no longer fight off the blasting cannons and are forced to reveal
their true nature. The Leviathans are sentient beings and beg for a truce,
surrendering themselves to Captain John.
Leviathans explain that they are an ancient race of high sentient creatures that
search the galaxy feeding on books to satisfy their hunger for knowledge.
They are sorry for eating the Fisherman Chronicles and only wish to end
this predicament that they have gotten into.
Nutbutter comes up with a brilliant idea for solving this dilemma.
The Leviathans are to give the Professor their excrement so that he can
run a detailed DNA analysis to extract the genetic structure of the Fisherman
Chronicles. The Leviathans agree to
the idea and hand over their excrement. They
promise never to visit Phondoo again and slither down towards their planet.
Nutbutter is successful with the experiment and extracts all of the Fisherman
Chronicle information contained in the excrement.
For he is a Entomologist… and knows of these things.
punishment for assisting the Leviathans, and as a form of rehabilitation,
Mr. Knowitall and Sergeant Baker, who are now children, are assigned to
use the extracted DNA information to re-write all of the Fisherman Chronicles
back into book form. They sit at
desks in the ship’s lab, a temporary classroom, and are instructed by their
teacher, Wynona, to begin the long task of re-writing the Fisherman Chronicles
back into the thousands of empty books that fill the room.
The Beaver acts as teacher’s pet
to make sure they do their homework.
Stonehard heads back through the portal and arrives at the sea of cheese.
The portal closes and Captain John orders the Stonehard be rocketed back
to the Great Chronicle Vaults of Punchbowl City.
The Stonehard’s rockets engage and the ship blasts away into the
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